I was actually having a pretty good week last week. I had a games day with Reen, Chloe and Rebecca. We played Kingdomino, Codenames, Anomia, and Blokus. It reminded me a little of Ben, because he works (used to work? I dunno) in a games café, and we also played board games on one of our dates. The winter coat that Tina had ordered for me from The North Face had arrived at her place. I think my friends in Singapore are also worried about me getting seasonal depression in Canada, and Pearlyn initiated a conversation in which she wanted to buy me heat tech pants from Uniqlo. I met my cousins to celebrate one of their birthdays. I met Kylee for the first time, she grew up in Texas but is working here now, she's half-Filipinx and really reminded me of Tina and we had a really good dinner together. I had a therapy session, during which my therapist said I'd made a breakthrough, and I felt like I was good to reduce the frequency of my sessions for the sake of my school savings (I currently do one hour of therapy every fortnight). Last night, though, I was woken up by terrible news to someone dear to me, and I began having nightmares. Dhuha, my one (1) friend in Vancouver for now, had posted Instagram stories, saying the air and entire landscape had a yellow tint to them, due to the NorCal wildfires. I Googled it and apparently it's also affecting the air quality in the town of my university. I had applied for school in New York and got in, then changed my plans due to the political situation of the USA, and now this happens. I want to be either cryogenically frozen and woken up from my slumber when the Earth is at a sustainable period, or tbh I want to fuck it all and move to Greenland (?) or the Bahamas (???) or I don't know, anywhere that's not affected by pandemics and climate change.
If this is how you've been feeling, you're not alone. Also, I've signed up for a mental health first aider course at work, as well as done some reading on it on my own. If you're struggling, you may approach me and I will try to help you. We can sit in this dumpster fire of a world together. It's not fine, and it's okay if you don't feel it's fine, because it's not.
